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Some things are non-negotiable deal breakers. What do you think of this list of things men said were instant red flags?
Recently someone asked the men of the internet, “What’s something a woman said or did that made you decide, on the spot, that you were done?” And here are the top-voted responses.
It’s Her or Me Ultimatum
One man shared that they fought the night before he and his girlfriend of five years were about to leave for his sister’s wedding in Hawaii. He found out she was hiding alcohol, and she was an alcoholic who agreed not to have liquor in their home.
However, he expressed that the real problem was her deciding not to go on the trip. “She got upset when I said I was still going. ‘You’re still gonna go without me?’
‘Yes, I’m walking my sister down the aisle!’ ‘If you leave, we’re done. It’s her or me.’ Five years, instantly over. It was like a clarity washed over me at that moment.”
Another shared that while it may seem trivial, he dumped a woman immediately after she littered. “She was in my car; we finished a water bottle, and she straight upchucked it out the window.”
Someone added, “This except what she did was we had got Chinese takeout, and she opened hers and took one bite and said I’m full and threw the whole thing right on the sidewalk.”
Slapped In The Face
Several men admitted that women had slapped them after one announced it was the reason he was immediately done with one relationship.
Another announced, “A woman who hits you often thinks she has the RIGHT to chastise you physically, and if you accept it, she will do it again. She’s often infantilizing you, too, convinced you NEED to be criticized and told what to do.”
Invading Her Privacy
One man volunteered, “After a good time together for months, she tried shaming me for finding out she was talking to ten guys behind my back. It took me a while to realize it was okay to leave someone who didn’t respect or desire me as I thought.”
Another noted they didn’t appreciate the “You violated my privacy” reflection his girlfriend gave him after discovering she was cheating from an innocent glance at her phone.
One man shared, “My ex-wife threw her phone at my daughter.” Several Redditors commended him for defending his daughter. For example, one said, “The day I lost all respect for my father was when he saw my stepmom slap my then 16-year-old sister and did absolutely nothing.
He didn’t get angry or say anything about it, even though he was ten feet away when she did it. Thanks for standing up for your daughter.”
The Household Bills Are Not My Problem
Someone explained when she said, “The household bills are not my problem.” To which he responded, “They are now.” Another sympathized, “Mine said, ‘Not to be all 1950s or anything, but it isn’t my responsibility to have to worry about the household finances.’
Oh, so I’m 100% responsible for the household’s finances and 50% of the upkeep/day-to-day (laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc.)? That mindset and math didn’t add up to me.”
Another shared, “I was emotionally spent at the end of a traumatic day. She knew what I had just gone through and when I broke down and started to cry, she just stared at me with a confused look before asking, ‘what are you doing?’ It was over.”
Admitted An Affair
One man expressed, “22 years together. 17 years marriage. She admitted to an affair. I’M OUT!” Several readers agreed with the sentiment, “Cheaters are the worst type of person. Glad you chose yourself.”
You Need to Change
“She wrote me a letter saying I needed to change my whole personality to what she thought I should be or break up with her. Well, that was an easy decision,” confessed another.
Psychoanalyzing on the First Date
Finally, a veteran shared, “On the first date, she started to psychoanalyze me, asking if I have PTSD and attempting to go into the details of my service with the Army. So she never got a callback, and I split the bill for dinner.”
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