Call and Uber and Go Home! 15 Hilarious Signs You Had One Too Many Drunko
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“What’s your ‘tell’ when you’ve had too much alcohol?” This intriguing question invites individuals to reflect on the signs that indicate they may have reached their limit. Join us as we explore the candid stories and perspectives shared by contributors, delving into the unique ways alcohol affects us. Through these shared experiences, we gain a deeper understanding of self-awareness and responsible drinking in social settings.
Slurred Speech
To begin, a user said, “I over-articulate words, so I can’t be accused of slurring.”
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A second user said, “I start to slur my speech, but I am so concentrated on not that I swear I sound great.”
Open Wallet
One person said, “I start buying drinks for strangers.”
Another person added, “I turn into Oprah after too many drinks. “YOU GET A SHOT! YOU GET A SHOT! EVERYBODY GETS A SHOT!”
Confident Behavior
A funny comment was, “I get beer goggles for myself. I’ll be going to the bathroom and catch a look in the mirror and think, god DAN/g, I’m a handsome motherf****er, as opposed to the sober version of me hissing and scampering away from mirrors like a vampire from a cross.”
Aggressiveness
Someone commented, “I think to myself “I could fight this entire bar full of people, man. That sounds like a good idea.” Wild Turkey 101, never again.”
Music Choices
One user replied, “For me, it’s probably when I elect myself the DJ and force people to listen to 90’s R&B/hip-hop, which is usually accompanied by me belting out every song…alone.”
A second user commented, “Dropping $20 in the juke.”
Vomiting
A popular comment was, “Usually, it’s the vomiting.”
Another comment was, “I take a swig of beer and hold it in my mouth for 10-15 seconds because I’m afraid I’ll puke if I swallow.”
Crazy Eyes
One person said, “As a baby, I was ridiculously cross-eyed but had surgery to fix it. I still can do crazy googly eyes on command when I get really tired. I know I’ve drank too much when I’m having a conversation with someone, and after about 5 minutes, they look behind them and ask, “Are you talking to me?” Dang googly eyes.”
Another person said, “My right eye goes half closed.”
Confused Conversation
A user replied, “I start making plans I can never attend. I’ve signed up for more things while drunk than I should. My worst was when I elected to take a family of 6 kids to raging waters the next day. Worst hangover ever.”
Bathroom Habits
One person said, “It’s really bizarre, but once I’ve had too much to drink every time I sit down to pee, I rub the tops of my thighs vigorously.”
Another person replied, “I always know when I go to the bathroom and spend a good amount of time in the mirror staring at myself either booty dancing or posing like I’m on America’s Next Top Model photo shoot.”
Excessive Laughter
One user said, “I have this really obnoxious laugh that I get when I am drunk.”
A second user commented, “I am really loud when I laugh. Which is weird because my normal laugh is normally pretty quiet.”
Inability to Work Anything
One comment was, “When nothing “works right.” (I.e., Too drunk to operate everyday items). The microwave suddenly becomes like trying to operate a Russian missile launch system.”
Loss of Belongings
Someone stated, “When I can’t remember where anything is. Yeah, I just put my beer right over… Where the heck is it? Ok, at least I know where my shirt… Dangit.”
Dance Moves
One person shared, “Not me but a guy I used to work with. At our company Christmas party, he told multiple people to cut him off once he tied his tie around his head and started dancing. About halfway through the party, the tie went around his head, and things got silly.”
Increased Volume of Speech
A very loud user replied, “I WOULD HAVE TO SAY IT’S THE VOLUME AT WHICH I SPEAK, BOTH IN DECIBELS AND NUMBER OF WORDS.”
Another user added, “I CAN’T TELL HOW LOUD I ACTUALLY AM. I FEEL LIKE I’M TALKING NORMALLY, AND MY FRIENDS KEEP TELLING ME TO TONE IT DOWN A NOTCH.”
Overly Talkative
A user commented, “My best friend was born in Australia and moved to the U.S. when she was about 10-11. When her Australian accent comes back, it’s time to cut her off.”
A second user replied, “When I start chatting up.”
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