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Motherhood Life Balance

15 Smart and Sassy Comebacks For Rude People Who Say “You’re Fat”

ByVictoria Cornell December 4, 2023December 4, 2023
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Sometimes mean things are said, like, “You’re fat.” But don’t worry – we’re here to figure out how to respond with confidence and respect. So, what’s the best thing to say? Let’s learn some strong comebacks that stop the negativity and remind us that we’re valuable and should feel good about ourselves.

Rebuttals 

Woman looking frustrated
Image Credit: Depositphotos Krakenimages.com.

To begin, a user shared, “My neighbor told me (as a joke) the other month that I was getting fat, so I told him the light reflecting off of his bald head was making me go blind.”

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Less Likely to Get Drafted

confident looking woman with arms crossed
Image credits: Depositphotos EdZbarzhyvetsky

One reply option was, “Less likely to get drafted.”

Another reply was, “At least the army won’t want me.”

Horrible Personalities 

Woman pointing to her tounge and doing a thumbs down looking disapointed
Image credit: Depositphotos SIphotography.

One popular comment was, “I can change my size, but you can’t change your horrible personality.”

A second comment was, “At least I have a personality.” 

Looks VS Weight

man with arms crossed showing no
Image credits: Depositphotos EdZbarzhyvetsky

A person said, “I may be fat, but you’re ugly, and l can diet.”

Another person added, “Oh, I know that one in Spanish, “Yo Gordo, Pero tu feo” I’m fat, but you’re ugly.”

Male Pregnancy?

Man looking confused
Image credit: Depositphotos Vadymvdrobot.

A user replied, “Actually, I’m pregnant. (I’m a guy.)”

A second user commented, “Maybe I’m just pregnant.” 

You Look “Tasty”

woman eating pizza happily
Image credits: Depositphotos olly18

One popular comment was, “You look tasty.”

A second comment was, “As Fat B would say: GET IN MY BELLLYYY!!”

Famous “Quotes”

woman standing confidently
Image credits: Depositphotos envivo

One user said, “You’re ugly and rude. I can lose weight if I want, but you’ll still be ugly and rude!”

To which another user replied, “I think Winston Churchill coined something similar to that after being called drunk: “Yes, I’m drunk, and you’re ugly, but tomorrow I’ll sober up, and you’ll still be ugly.”

Surprise

woman looking shocked with her hands on her face
Image credits: Depositphotos deagreeze1

A response was, “I’ve always enjoyed acting surprised by this knowledge. “Holy shoot, really? What? Why didn’t anyone tell me?”

Another response was, ‘I’ve had a couple of students (7th grade) make fat comments, and this is how I handled it, accompanied by dramatically dropping to my knees and wailing.”

Shout At Them

Man screaming looking angry
Image credit: Depositphotos deagreez1.

An interesting choice was, “Shout: I SAID I WON’T HAVE RELATIONS WITH YOU.”

Another choice was, “I DON’T KNOW YOU!!”

Kidnap

Woman looking frustrated gripping her hands in the air
Image credit: Depositphotos AsierRomeroCarballo.

One user commented, “I’m harder to kidnap.”

A second user added, “I always joke that if someone is able to kidnap me, I’m proud of them because they’ve obviously been putting in time at the gym.”

Mom Jokes

woman looking disappointed with thumb down
Image credits: Depositphotos Krakenimages.com

A comment was, “Your mother doesn’t complain.”

Another comment was, “That’s because your mom makes me a sandwich every time I hang with her.” I don’t remember where I heard that, but that’s what popped into my head.”

A third comment was, “Your Mom jokes trump Fat jokes. There’s a field we haven’t studied here.’

Answer With Silence

confident older woman
Image credits: Depositphotos albejor2002@hotmail.com

One smart answer was, “Pause long enough to create an awkward silence. Then “That’s a weird thing to say to someone.” Then abruptly change the subject and let their stupidity swallow them whole. Repeat as needed.”

Take It As A Compliment

A man with his hand on his chin thinking
Image Credit: Depositphotos IgorVetushko

A person wrote, “Oh wow, thank you sooo much. That’s the best thing anyone has said to me today. I used to be obese.”

Honesty

talking MSN
Photo Credit: Adobe Stock.

One response was, “I’ve seen a similar exchange previously. The receiver of the insult was very level-headed and said something along the lines of “I know being overweight is a serious risk to my health, and I’ve already lost a lot of weight, and I know I still have a lot of work to do.” The insulter went from being a bad person to congratulating them and saying they themselves could stand to lose a few pounds for their health as well.”

Violence 

angry MSN
Photo Credit: Canva Pro

Finally, a user suggested, “Pull your stomach out of your shirt and hit them over the head with it. That will shut them up.” Source: Reddit

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Victoria Cornell
Website |  + postsBio

As a full-time working mom of three, I know what it’s like to feel like life is out of balance and out of control.

While I don’t have it all figured out, I am committed to sharing helpful tips and tricks with other mommas who are ready to break free from negativity, ditch mom guilt, & finally, live life on their own terms.

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