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While scrolling the internet, I came across a wholesome question. A Redditor asked, “What is your best piece of marriage advice?” Here are the best responses.
1. Pick Your Battles
“Pick your battles. Your husband didn’t put the vacuum away after cleaning the living room? Just put the damn vacuum away.
Your wife leaves her wet towel on the bed sometimes? Hang it up. Let things go. A damp towel or vacuum cleaner is not worth passive-aggressively fighting about,” shared one.
2. Be Nice
VeryCanadianCanadian suggested, “Happily married for over 25 years. That is the best advice I can give. Honestly, be nice. Yup, be nice. Say thank you. Say please.
Appreciate every little thing your spouse does for you. Compliment each other. Hold hands. Listen when they talk. Just be kind to each other.” Another joked, “Username checks out.”
3. Learn How To Communicate Through Disagreements
Learn how to communicate through disagreements. For example, we have a neutral place to discuss what we are arguing about,” one explained. “We call it couch talk, so if we get to the point of yelling, we say ‘couch talk.’
Sometimes just saying this is enough to resolve without visiting the couch. There are rules on the sofa, sitting facing each other, no interruptions when one is speaking, and for sure, an apology is in order on one side or the other—married 30 years now.”
4. Nobody Wins Stupid Arguments
One user replied, “Sometimes winning a stupid argument is stupider than just saying sorry and letting it go. It was the first hard lesson I learned about being married. After that, the adage of picking your battles started making sense.”
5. Don’t Keep Secrets
“Only a present should be a secret,” answered another. “Don’t hold anything back because you think your significant other can’t handle it. You’re a team now – handle it together.”
After a few arguments, some thought that little white lies are sometimes ok if it does not add pain to the relationship. For example, saying your ex is hotter.
Finally, a therapist clarified, “I always advise not to answer every question and not to ask every question that pops your head. The ‘will this contribute to my relationship?’ guide has proved helpful.”
6. Develop a Sense of Humor
“Drop the ego, and grow a sense of humor. You’d be amazed at how much you can get through with those two things,” confessed one.
“This is excellent advice and is exactly how my husband and I are. Life is far too short for drama, and I feel lucky to have married someone I can truly laugh with,” a second user replied.
7. Separate Blankets on the Bed
“Separate blankets on the bed,” said one. “We do this too. At first, I felt a little sad, but we both sleep much better now!” another exclaimed. Finally, a third admitted, “I got married this past summer, and it took about three nights for us to figure this out.”
8. Don’t Plan on Changing Them
“Don’t marry with the intention or hope of them changing. If you don’t love them for exactly who they are, you’ll never love them the right way and will grow bitter when they don’t change how they promise they will,” warned one.
“Don’t bank on change. Instead, learn to accept and take any change as a bonus.” Another added, “Also, don’t marry hoping they won’t change one bit cause life happens and changes us all.”
9. Keep Going on Dates
Many people in the thread agreed with the statement, “Keep going on dates!” However, one joked, “But only if you discuss it in depth and agree on some boundaries.”
The joke went over many people’s heads, and one replied, “I think they meant to keep going on dates with each other. Not other people.”
10. Show Appreciation
“Show appreciation. Always. If she does the dishes every day. Tell her- thank you every day. You take out the trash. She tells you – thank you. Compliment each other daily.
If she runs an errand for you, say thank you, I appreciate it, and vice versa. Learn to communicate your feelings in a way that isn’t accusing. Before you criticize, think, what will this accomplish?
Popular Reading: 10 Honest Things Women Aren’t Ready to Hear According to Men
Is it necessary to voice this? Is it helpful? If the answer is no, keep your criticism to yourself (both of you)—basically, more daily appreciation of each other for little things and less criticism.”
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