Is There an Ideal Financial Moment for Starting a Family? Her Readiness Versus His Notion of Timing
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There comes a point in many relationships where one person suggests the idea of having a baby. In an ideal world, the other person will be on board with the suggestion, and you will both look forward to expanding your family.
However, there are also times when one person in the relationship will be unsure of the idea. A Reddit user (25M) has recently taken to the platform to express his reasons why he doesn’t think the timing is right to have a baby despite his partner thinking otherwise. Here is what he had to say.
Money Money Money
The original poster starts off by explaining that the topic of having a baby has been constantly on the agenda for the past few weeks. His partner (24F) has been bringing it up a lot, saying that the thought of having a baby gives her strength.
While this makes OP happy because his partner has recently been undergoing therapy after going through some tough times, he doesn’t think that the pair are in a financial position to have a baby at this moment in time.
OP’s partner has recently quit her job and hasn’t managed to find anything else as of yet. Meanwhile, he is still a student in medical school, meaning they don’t have nearly enough income between them to support a child.
He has told her that they should wait until he has qualified as a doctor and she has a new job before even thinking about having a baby. Additionally, he would like to build up some savings before bringing a child into the world.
Unfortunately, it seems as if OP’s words haven’t been properly digested by his partner. Over the past couple of days, she has continued to bring it up, saying that she is excited to be pregnant and that he can’t wait.
Taking to Reddit, he was seeking advice on how he can properly get it through to her that they should postpone baby-making until they are in a better financial position.
Getting the Point Across
The post attracted a lot of attention, with the vast majority of the 215 comments all backing OP in one way or another. Some people suggested that OP’s partner needed to see the figures presented to her to help her understand how hard it would be to bring up a child in their current situation:
“Tell her to complete a full spreadsheet of costs, needed income streams, and how that affects current costs and income once a child is in play. Then, how and who will be working? If she won’t or can’t do this, you are dating a child in the body of a woman.”
Others were concerned about the fact that she thought that a baby would give her “strength”. One user commented:
“She needs to understand children aren’t emotional support animals. It’s not their job to make her feel better. She’s so not ready. Not sure why she thinks she is. Also, she’s only 24. She has time.”
Is OP well in his right to have reservations about having a baby or is there realistically never a “good” time to have one?
We hope you enjoyed this Reddit thread. This article is inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Motherhood Life Balance.
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