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Words that Wound: Unforgettable Sayings from Toxic Family Members

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Growing up is hard enough, but growing up in a toxic household can be very overwhelming! Many of us have grown up in homes where parents feel like they are superior beings and that whatever they say goes. If your parents were this way, you probably have some pretty infuriating sayings. Recently, someone asked the question, “Did anyone else’s parent(s) repeat the same infuriating sayings over and over to assert their superiority?”

“Philosophical” Sayings

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Image credit: Depositphotos tonodiaz.

One Redditor wrote, “My dad used to say to me, “Seek to understand before you seek to be understood.”
A second Redditor added, “Do as I say, not as I do. Did this ever give me a borderline criminal mindset? Thank goodness the constant fear of messing up and getting my a** beat for being out of line taught me some self-control and discipline.”

Lying Sayings

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Image credit: Depositphotos Slphotography.

A user commented, “My mom would say, “If there is one thing I can’t stand in this world is liars.” She would lie. Daily.”

Another user added, “I got “you’re a liar, and I hate liars” which, according to my Mom, did not mean she hated me.”

Crying Sayings

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A Redditor replied, “I’ll give you something to cry about,” but, ya know, after giving me more than enough to cry about.”

A second Redditor wrote, “The variation, you know-to, keep it interesting, was “You’d better stop crying, or I’ll give you something to cry about.” As my brother or I would be hyperventilating, trying to calm ourselves as they instilled more fear into us.”

Finally, one Redditor commented, “As an adult, trying to communicate with my mother “no use crying over spilled milk” is her favorite.”

Religious Sayings

Stressed Mom Woman holding her head looking down.
Image credit: Depositphotos dragonstock.

One comment was, “Honor thy mother and thy father.😩”

Another comment read, “People in hell want ice water.”

 Intelligence Sayings

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Image credit: Depositphotos VitalikRadko.

One user wrote, “My mom’s fav was “Insanity is repeating the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results.” Aka, she was calling me insane for failing tests and not wanting to listen to her.”

Another user added, “I may not always be right, but I am never wrong” It Should be emblazoned on the narcissist flag.” 

Future Sayings

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Image credit: Depositphotos Jaykayl.

A user added, “You wait until you have children.” delivered in a self-pitying tone and used by Mom to shut down any discussion whatsoever of anything I wasn’t happy about, translation- “whatever it is, I’m blameless, and anyway we can’t possibly discuss it for the next 20+ years.”

Respect Sayings

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Image credits: Depositphotos alphasprit.

One Redditor commented, “Respect is earned,” But they were entitled to respect for themselves and their beliefs.”

Threatening Statements

Criticize Their Kids: boy covering his ears and screaming
Image credits: Depositphotos studiograndouest.

A user replied, “My favorite, “Wait till your father gets home!” My father was not mean and had no idea what my mom was doing to us when he was at work. He’d come home and be like, “Uh, okay? Calm down.”

Another user added, “I brought you into this world, and I can take you out of it!” 

Blaming Sayings

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Image credits: Depositphotos vadimphoto1@gmail.com.

One Redditor wrote, “You are your own worst enemy,” as I’d be getting my teeth kicked in lol.”

A second Redditor added, “Mine would ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS say “don’t be sorry, just don’t do it” to me as a kid who made mistakes often (because, you know, kids). Ugh”

Opinion Sayings

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Image credit: Depositphotos AndrewLozovyi.

A most liked saying was, “If I wanted your opinion, I would have asked for it.”

Another comment said, “My perception is my reality.” It was basically to say that your point of view, or even factual reality isn’t important, only what he thinks.”Redditors shared many infuriating sayings their toxic parents and family members used to say. Did your parents say anything rude? Was your family full of toxic sayings?

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The word “gaslighting” is thrown around a lot these days. The purpose of gaslighting is to make someone believe they are crazy when in reality, they are not.  – 10 Surprising Phrases Your Partner Is Using to Gaslight You

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