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How far is so far when you and your in laws don’t get along? Was she rude here or did she have it coming?
A user on Reddit talks about her experience with her sister-in-law and the events that lead up to her informing her SIL that her food is bland.
Off to a Rocky Start
The original poster (OP) explains that her SIL hates her and can’t be in a room with her for more than 10 minutes without having a complaint about her. OP also mentions that her SIL went to culinary school but dropped out because of medical issues and likes to remind everyone that she was studying to be a caterer.
OP says around 2 weeks ago she cooked a traditional Thai dish (she is half Thai, half British) called “Tom Yum gung.” She had leftovers and brought it to her in-laws for them to try.
OP admits that it might have been too spicy but that they were very polite and said they liked it. The SIL, on the other hand, refused to try it and said, “No not really I won’t enjoy it, I hate spice and it looks like it’ll overwhelm me. If it was less spicy then I might try it but I’m okay.”
OP lets her know that she’s not offended, as Tom Yum gung is supposed to be a spicier soup, and it’s not for everyone. The SIL then states that she can make it less spicy and it would probably taste better. She then made a show to remind everyone that she went to culinary school.
A few weeks later, OP and her husband are at their in-laws for dinner. OP notices that there is a bowl of Tom Yum gung in the middle of the table, and assumes that the SIL made good on her promise to make it less spicy and better. So OP tried it. She said, “it was like salty water with bits of chicken floating about.”
Obviously trying not to be rude, OP said gently to her SIL, “It’s nice, but it’s bland, and it doesn’t really have the flavor of Tom Yum”. The SIL didn’t take it very well and said it’s actually “British Tom Yum” and that OP wouldn’t know anything about “British taste.”
OP decided to leave the dinner table and head outside to get some fresh air, and her husband followed. He told her not to make a scene and to go back in. OP said she felt that what her SIL said had been racist and in response, he said, “it’s just banter, it’s not like you’ve not heard people say that to you whilst in the forces” (they served in the British military together). OP then left her in-laws’ house to go home.
Was OP right to become upset? Was the sister-in-law right to say what she did? How would you react in this situation?
This article was produced and syndicated by Motherhood Life Balance.
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Claire started Femme on FIRE after struggling with the debt cycle and realizing that she had to create better habits to get out of it. She became inspired along this journey and now strives to help others achieve financial freedom as well. When she isn’t working on her blog, you can find her on the couch with a good book, cooking up recipes in the kitchen, or playing outside with her ducks.