Everyone Is Upset Arise After A Grandma Made Rude Comment About A Child’s Parent Who Passed Away

Is this a story of someone wanting a better gift, or was this a small gift to send a message? Tempers are high in this family who has gone through a lot and is trying to make sense of a new family dynamic. 

Recently a Redditor stopped by the threads to ask if he was being unreasonable about his feelings towards his wife after a spat with his mother.

Gift Giving

The original poster (OP) is married, he and his wife share a two-year-old, and he has a stepdaughter from his wife’s previous marriage. His stepdaughter, whose father passed away, does not call him dad and only refers to him as “Mr., then his last name.” OP says it’s a little bothersome to him, but he wants his stepdaughter to feel comfortable with it and doesn’t press the issue. He also says that he and his stepdaughter are not terribly close but have a good relationship, and she is head over heels for her new sibling.

OP goes on to say that he, his wife, and their daughters couldn’t get together with his side of the family over Christmas, so his family had a late Christmas/New Year’s gathering. OP’s mom gave his stepdaughter a Christmas gift. It was a sketchbook because she considers herself an artist and enjoys painting/drawing. OP said his stepdaughter and wife were disappointed in the gift. 

Grandma Aftermath

 A bit later, OP’s wife pulled his mother aside and said that her oldest daughter was hurt by the very simple gift to the daughter. OP’s mother replied to her that she went out of her way to get her stepgranddaughter a gift as a grandmother despite how she feels about her new stepfather and that if they have such an issue with it, they can go find her (stepdaughters) real father and ask him for a gift.

OP said that due to the comments his mother made to his wife. It caused a bit of a scene as she didn’t take that comment well and said his mother has “no respect” for them.

OP said he tried to calm the situation down and told his mom she was being a little harsh. He also told his wife she was causing a scene and blowing up for no reason, that she was the one nitpicking about gifts, and that his mom just responded to her out-of-line comments.

OP’s wife got angry with him for saying that and said he should’ve defended her.

Reddit Weighs In

Redditors took sides pretty quickly with this one and gave their opinions about this mother, wife, and stepdaughter situation.

One Redditor said, “.WHAT?!?! “Go ask your dead dad for a present” …OP is defending this?! And blaming his wife for being rightfully upset about both the favoritism and the unforgivably cruel remark?! I hope Kate has started contacting divorce lawyers. There is no coming back from this. YTA You and your mother are the biggest A’s of them all.”

A second Redditor said, “You say you’re not bothered by it but apparently you’ve bitched and complained enough to your Mom that Mommy dearest has taken up the offense for you.

Yeah, it feels like OP let mom do the dirty work for him, and he secretly thinks Liz deserved it (while being very careful not to voice that explicitly). He seems to have secretly enjoyed mom’s dig at Liz (both the cheap present and the horrible remark). OP and mom are both huge AHs.”

A third Redditor said, “This makes his remark in the post about being bothered that Liz doesn’t call him dad all the worse. Liz lost the man that she called Dad. That grief is profound. On top of that, OP is expecting her to tack on a feeling of guilt that she is calling someone else Dad. OP needs to step back, take a seat, and read the GD room.”

Another Redditor said, “Wow. And all he said was “that’s harsh”! Op should be wanting to protect his stepdaughter from being treated like crap, and since mommy went for the jugular he should have told her off. YTA and Liz deserve better from you. Telling your mommy off would be a great start for not only getting her something that is for a child but for that comment. Just because she calls you by a formal name doesn’t mean you still shouldn’t be protecting her. God, you and your mommy are a h*** of the top tier.”

Another user said, “This is one of those posts where you can’t believe that the OP is so clueless. Reading through his comments only got worse and worse with each one.”

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