Lessons from Lifetimes: Older Women’s Emotional Advice for the Next Generation
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Oh, to be young and carefree again! But as we all know, youth is wasted on the young. Fortunately, older women are here to share their pearls of wisdom with the next generation. These wise ladies were asked a simple question: what is something young women are doing that puzzles you?
Relationships
To start, one Redditor wrote, “One is the weird obsession with knowing where their partner is at all times. One girl threw a mini fit because her partner’s Snapchat location wasn’t on, and she was scarily angry about it.”
Another person said, “Accepting the bare minimum from dating. I see so many young women who are dating/ catering to/ ‘talking to’/ moving in with men who don’t seem at all interested in them. I can’t tell if it’s a legit shift in expectations and dating or if I’m just middle-aged.”
Dating Apps and Online Dating
A user replied, “Dating apps, wanting a relationship but feeling obligated to have intercourse quickly (“because how else will you get to know each other and be in a relationship”).”
Hookup culture
A popular comment was, “Sending nudes to men they’re not dating. “Talking” to guys…just go on a few dates and decide if you want a relationship, for god’s sake. All this “we’ve been talking for a few months now” is weird.”
A second comment said, “Talking” is code for casual intercourse. And people have been doing it outside of formal, public relationships since time immemorial.”
Marriage and Commitment
A user wrote, “Having children with men who are basically children themselves. If you’re living with a guy and he doesn’t do a genuine 50% of the housework, it will be exponentially worse when you have a baby.”
A second user added, “Not only that but having kids with men who have no commitment to them. I know multiple, multiple young women who absolutely ruined their lives and tanked their futures by thinking having a baby for a guy would get him to commit, maybe even marry her, and take care of her and the kid(s) forever. “
Gender roles
A most-liked comment was, “Glorifying submissive misogynistic gender roles, trying to codify it into law, and shaming others who exercise and defend their rights to choose something else for their life.”
Career and Work-life Balance
A surprised user commented, “My daughter applied for her first high school job at a drive-through restaurant. I was shocked that a video introduction was a mandatory part of the application process.”
Body image and beauty standards
One Redditor replied, “The overdone lip injections. I can’t wait for this trend to die.”
A second Redditor added, “Well done makeup, including contouring. I am an old hag and NEVER mastered the art, and now it seems like everyone is able to do it, and no matter what, I still look like a rodeo clown if I try. Young women who are into it seem to watch a couple of videos and become total artists. Beginner tutorial: find the right shade… Aaaaand I’m done.’
Friendships and social circles
A user commented, “Supporting each other. When I was a teenager, even the closest of girlfriend groups had a noticeable level of petty and competition. Now I hear my daughter and her friends talking, and the genuine love and support they constantly show for each other is amazing. The respect shines through.”
Parenting and family dynamics
A popular comment was, “Blasting pictures of their young children all over social media with 1000 followers.”
A second comment said, “Allowing their young children on social media. What 11 year old needs TikTok?”
Money management and finances
One Redditor replied, “I am bewildered by women who do not prioritize the ability to support themselves.”
Education and Lifelong Learning
An annoyed user wrote, “I am only 28, so I don’t think I count as older, but I am shocked when I see the complete lack of work ethic in my fellow classmates in college. Maybe I should blame my small-town values….I don’t get it. Are you not here paying to learn?”
Politics and Social Justice
A Redditor replied, “Voting for politicians that want to reduce women’s rights. Not just abortion, but reduced healthcare and maternal/paternal leave, not supporting legislation that guarantees equal pay, laws that make it harder to get justice after SA, etc. Why do you vote for these people who hate your womanhood and actively try to suppress you?”
Travel and Adventure
A user commented, “The whole “Van life is so glamorous, look at me sipping my coffee sitting in the back of my van in front of the sunrise” thing is WAY overrated and very, very fake. Van life or camper life can be fun and an adventure at times, yes – but it comes with a LOT of work, expense, and risk that people don’t tell you about.”
Technology and social media
A popular comment was, “Crying on the internet. I’m talking full-on snot bubble crying. Maybe it’s my childhood trauma talking, but I can’t fathom having an awful thing happen to me and then whipping out my phone to tell my “followers” about it.”
A second comment said, “Letting everyone on the internet know exactly where you are at all times and what your schedule seems a bit nuts.”
Health and Fitness
One Redditor wrote, “Wearing super heavy, elaborate, over-the-top makeup to the store with sweatpants and a hoodie. Or to the gym, for a walk, everywhere.”
A second Redditor added, “Very very young women getting plastic surgery and obsessing over their gym routine. When I was 18, it never occurred to me to work out heavily for aesthetics or get Botox or fillers.”
Aging and Changing
A user commented, “Botox and plastic surgery when they were pretty beforehand and look eerily stiff and altered after.”
Another user replied, “Getting surgery as soon as they turn 18.”
Fashion and Style
A Redditor replied, “Incredibly long nails and over-the-top false eyelashes.”
A second Redditor added, “This is really small and makes me feel really ancient, but pulling their bathing suits up their butt cracks. It just looks SO uncomfortable to me, but y’all do you. I’ll sit over in my full coverage, a granny bathing suit that’s probably ugly, but I’ll be comfy.”
Self-confidence and Self-esteem
One person wrote, “Taking pictures of yourself all the time. Even as a younger person, I can’t imagine doing this.”
Another person added, “The young women I’ve worked with and met are so confident. They don’t tolerate the ******* that we did. They know their own worth in the workplace. They’re doing great. I just wish they weren’t so economically f****.”
Love and Loss
Finally, one Redditor replied, “Putting up with the bull, you know, isn’t ok. We all do this, but as a 40-something, it’s painful to watch young women continue to just stay in abusive or even just frustrating imbalanced relationships. Realize your worth, ladies..sooner than later.”
There’s no denying that the generation gap between younger and older women can lead to some confusion and misunderstandings, and this Reddit thread proved that!
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