Married Persons and Long-Time Partners Share Priceless Advice for Couples
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Love, commitment, and navigating life’s ups and downs together—married readers and long-time partners have undoubtedly accumulated a wealth of wisdom and experience in their relationships. In this heartfelt exploration, we pose the question: Married readers/long-time partners, what is the best piece of advice you could offer to a couple?
To begin, a Redditor replied, “Don’t hold in [b****** issue goes here]. Your partner actually can’t read your mind.”
A second Redditor added, “Yes. Communication is the most important relationship skill to learn. That and timing. What you say and how you say it is just as important as when you say it. And the best way to learn is to say….”
One user wrote, “For a long-term partnership to work, abandon any notion you have that responsibility is shared 50/50 between partners. Each is responsible for 100% – and you always check one another’s back.”
One Redditor replied, “Playfully teasing your spouse/partner in front of friends seems like a good way to passively point out his/her flaws while livening the conversation with some humor. Do not be fooled. This is a bad idea.”
A user replied, “Kids are great additions to a stable, healthy relationship and a misery accelerator to an unstable, unhealthy relationship.”
A second user added, “When arguing, seek to understand before seeking to be understood.”
A popular comment stated, “Frequently express your appreciation and affection for the smallest things. “Thank you for taking out the trash.” “I like what you did with the dining room.” “You look really nice today.” “I love you.”
Another comment was, “Say ‘thank you’ as much as, or more than, ‘I Love you’. Let your partner know how grateful you are for them every day.”
Shared Values and Goals
A well-stated comment said, “Encourage your partner to be their best version of themselves -believe in them when they don’t believe in themselves.”
One Redditor wrote, “Many couples fight over small chores like trash, laundry, or dishes. I decided to just do them without her asking whenever I saw they needed to be done. It is an insanely small amount of time for a huge payoff. I could load the dishwasher and wash the dishes that didn’t go in it in about 5 minutes. She would absolutely lose her mind with joy when I did.”
A user commented, “Don’t lie. Almost every major problem within relationships starts with a lie. If your relationship can handle the truth, then it can handle anything.”
Independence and Individuality
One Redditor added, “Be able to have your own life, friends, hobbies, etc… It is great to have a best friend that you can share and do things with on a regular basis. It is just as important for both partners to be able to go out separately with their own friends from time to time.”
A second Redditor wrote, “Coming from a woman, you need to be able to keep your independence, ladies (and men, for that matter). I’ve seen a lot of girlfriends drop everything in their lives for a man, and it’s not good for your relationship and, more importantly, yourself.”
Friendship and Companionship
A Redditor replied, “Most of the time you spend together is going to be non-s*****al, so you better be best friends, or it won’t last.”
Intimacy and Romance
A simple comment read, “Don’t stop dating your s.o.”
A second comment was, “Do things together that aren’t s*****. Go bowling/hiking/whatever you want to do together. (Have s****, too, though!).”
Strengths and Weaknesses
One Redditor replied, “Find each other’s strengths and weaknesses. Use them to compliment and empower one another rather than to belittle or mock. Neither of you is perfect in the grand scheme of things. In fact, loving a person with flaws does not change the person to love them. You both will be happier.”
Continual Learning and Growth
A user commented, “Remember that they are the same person after the new labels. I’ve seen it all fall apart because the boyfriend’s cute little habits were not something a husband should do. “We are married now! You can’t do that!!” It’s easy to get lost in labels (because Wife and Husband are long-defined terms. They come with much baggage.) If your girlfriend sucked at dishes, news flash, your wife will too.”
Supporting Each Other’s Dreams and Aspirations
One Redditor replied, “Build them up – be their biggest fan. Remind them daily that they are important, that they are loved.”
Another Redditor wrote, “Make all major decisions together. Even excepting a job offer should be agreed upon.”
Finally, a Redditor commented, “Have fun! It seems like a ton of the couples we know always seem to be knee-deep in drama, while my wife and I are knee-deep in a prank war.”
This heartfelt thread has provided a treasure trove of wisdom and advice from married Redditors and long-time partners. The shared experiences and insights emphasize the importance of communication, trust, compromise, and respect in nurturing a strong and lasting relationship. From finding quality time to keeping the spark alive, maintaining a sense of humor, to supporting each other’s dreams, these words of wisdom offer guidance for couples embarking on their own journey of love and companionship.
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