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When you’re pregnant, it’s normal to have pregnancy cravings, but how far is too far? Should your family cater to your pregnancy wants? Her sister-in-law had strong views on pregnancy cravings and decided not to help. Would you?
The original poster (OP) in this story tells her sister-in-law (SIL) they (OP and husband) won’t cater to her because she is down on her luck and pregnant.
Pregnant And Needy
The original poster (OP) recently posted to Reddit about her SIL, who is six months pregnant, high risk, and unable to work and, because of the situation, couldn’t keep her apartment. OP said that the father wasn’t in the picture, so the SIL moved in with OP and her husband.
Their Relationship Has Never Been Great
The OP and her SIL have never had the best relationship, but she put that aside because her husband wanted to help her. OP and her husband are not charging her rent as she has very little money, and they are buying all the groceries and doing most of the cooking.
Their Healthy Lifestyle
OP says she and her husband live a healthy lifestyle, and they don’t like a lot of junk food in the house as they want their kids to have healthier options. She says they have “junk” food but not much because of how they want to live.
Her Sister’s Requests
The SIL has been requesting candy, ice cream, chips, pizza rolls, and basically any junk food because she has cravings.
OP says they don’t have a lot of extra money either, so they don’t really want to spend additional money on food that no one but the SIL would eat and does not want her kids using that as an excuse to eat junk either.
The Request for Different Meals
The SIL has also been asking OP to cook different meals because certain meals make her feel sick, and the OP feels it’s unfair because she has two kids to feed, and it’s hard enough to get them to eat what she cooks.
Recently the SIL complained again that they don’t keep anything she can eat in the house, didn’t eat the food OP made, and later that evening, she asked OP to go get her something from the store or fast food.
The Final Straw
This irritated the OP, and she told her that they were fine with helping her, but they weren’t her kid’s father, and we weren’t just going to cater to her because she was knocked up. This made the SIL cry, and now the OP’s husband feels caught in the middle.
Redditors Weigh In
The Redditors had a lot to say about the SIL and OP’s situation.
One Redditor said, “NTA. You’re going above and beyond in allowing her to live in your home and provide quality shelter and food for her. Cravings are not necessities- they want. She’s in a situation where pure and simple; she didn’t prepare herself to get all of her wants. Your comment was not out of line. She’s not the first pregnant person ever, and her failure to plan is not your problem to solve.”
A second Redditor said, “Remind her that nothing bad happened from not satisfying a craving.”
Advice to Apply for Help
A third Redditor was quick to say, “If she’s in the u.s., she needs to apply for WIC or food stamps/EBT/ SNAP or whatever the current term is. This could lessen the food bill load on the family and allow her to get the food she can tolerate more.
I’m currently pregnant, so I understand food aversions and cravings, but I can’t imagine acting entitled to the family that is preventing you from being homeless.”
No Long-Term Plans?
Another user pointed out, “What is her long-term plan? Because it looks like she’s sticking around once she’s given birth. No baby daddy in the picture, no partner, and if anyone else would have offered her to stay with them, she’d be with them
To which another user responded, “Not only that but no job or home. What about daycare? I see Sil being there for a long time if she ever leaves at all.”
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