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Educating children is a significant milestone for parents and adults involved in a child’s journey, representing one of the most valuable contributions we, as grown-ups, can make to a child’s development. However, it’s important to acknowledge that not all lessons imparted to children are driven by genuine motives or are suitable for their understanding and exposure.
Adults Are Always Right
“That adults (or anyone older than them) are always right no matter the situation.”
A user responded, “I was told ‘because I said so’ constantly as a child. I’d continue asking why and then receive ‘because I am your parent and am always right.”
To Not Ask Questions
“Not to question things or think critically. The number of times I’ve seen people just shut down their kids for asking a question is wild. It’s no wonder there are so many stupid people out there when they were taught from a young age that asking questions is a bad thing.”
One user responded to this comment with, “That was my mom. Whenever I asked her something, she always said “why do you need to know this?”
To Fear Failure
“That failure is something to be ashamed of and to avoid at all costs. But, unfortunately, we all fail sometimes, and we need to be able to accept that reality,” one replied. Another shared the quote, “THE only man who makes no mistakes is the man who never does anything.”—President Roosevelt.
Finally, a third Star Trekkie shared, “It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness; that is life.” Captain Jean-Luc Picard.”
There Are No Consequences
“That they can scream and throw tantrums to get what they want. The number of parents who give in to that noise and enable them to become monsters addicted to tablets is ridiculous.”
After that a user replied, “That their words and actions do not have consequences and that mummy and daddy will always clean up their messes.”
If He’s Mean to You, He Likes You
One person volunteered a harmful mentality to hold, “If he’s mean to you, he likes you. I tell my daughter, ‘It doesn’t matter if he likes you. If he’s not kind, he’s not worth your time.”
A second clarified, “For little kids, this is possibly true as being a pest is their way of seeking attention. However, we need to teach little boys and girls to set, communicate, and respect boundaries at a young age. Easier said than done because many adults need help understanding this.”
They DO NOT Need to show Affection
A user commented, “You need to hug/kiss someone when you see them or are leaving, and that includes family. If you don’t want to kiss, that’s fine. Say goodbye in your own polite way.”
After that, “I hate when people force their kid to hug me bye. My husband’s side of the fam sometimes pressures our nephew into hugs, but I’m always saying, “no, it’s okay if he doesn’t.”
Their Feelings & Opinions Don’t Matter
“That because they are kids their feelings don’t matter.”
Another commented, “ I remember that one day, I was feeling really depressed and told a teacher about it. His answer was “you´re to young to be depressed.”
That You Need To Be Friends With Everyone
“That you need to be friends with everyone,” one replied. “Help them understand that it is normal and healthy to have a variety of friendships and that not everyone will be a good fit as a friend.”
“For example, you can explain that sometimes people have different interests, values, or personalities that make it difficult for them to get along or to have a meaningful friendship. It’s a perfect example of helping kids establish a growth mindset.”
That Play Ends When You Reach Adulthood
That play ends when you reach adulthood. But play is essential, even when we’re grown. It helps maintain a positive mindset and experience,” shared one. “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing. – George Bernard Shaw.”
Another added, “When I became a man, I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.” – CS Lewis.”
To Ignore Bullies
“To ignore bullies,” one admitted. “As a former teacher, it does nothing to address the issue. The bullying persists 100% of the time.” Another shared, “I still feel the effects of feeling like a second-class citizen (I’m 40). I was bullied in grade and middle school, and it took a long time for me to realize I deserve happiness as much as the next person.”
“I’ve ignored kicks to the head in the locker room, and the classroom can confirm ignoring it shows that you’ll take it. It’s very anti-Reddit, but the best thing I ever did was fight back. Bullies want to bully, not get hit in the face; getting hit in the face sucks,” a third user replied.
You Can Get What You Want if You’re Nice
“You can get what you want if you’re nice,” one replied. “It teaches children how to be manipulative and dishonest. Instead, teach them to handle ‘No.’ Too many people grow up and get offended at being told no.”
Saying Please and I’m Sorry Aren’t Magical Fixes
“Please isn’t a magic word. It often won’t get you what you want. And I’m sorry doesn’t erase a wrong and is only one small part of an apology, which the wronged party is not obligated to accept,” another explained.
While They Are Special, They Are No More Special Than Anyone Else
“While they are special, they are no more special than anyone else. I regularly tell my students, ‘All of you are unique, but none of you are special,” one suggested. However, a second argued, “I would disagree. I would add the caveat that No one is really special to everyone. But everyone has the capability of being special to someone.”
“I Before E, Except After C.” This Rule Has So Many Exceptions That It Should Not Be Considered a Rule.
“I before E, except after C.” This rule has so many exceptions that it should not be considered a rule,” one stated. Finally, someone elaborated, “Except when you’re a foreign neighbor, Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty, caffeinated weightlifters. Weird.”
Clean Your Plate
“A Redditor said, “”Clean your plate. Making kids continue to eat when they are full leads to eating disorders. It will at least make them fat.”
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As a full-time working mom of three, I know what it’s like to feel like life is out of balance and out of control.
While I don’t have it all figured out, I am committed to sharing helpful tips and tricks with other mommas who are ready to break free from negativity, ditch mom guilt, & finally, live life on their own terms.