10 Hard Things About Break-Ups You Don’t Think About Until After the Relationship
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What’s something challenging about break-ups that you don’t consider until after the relationship ends? After someone asked the women of Reddit for examples, these are the top-voted difficulties.
One woman volunteered, “Friendship. When you have a significant other, that person becomes your closest friend, the person you call first about anything. And then they are not there.”
“Associations,” replied another. “That one song, ice cream place, intersection, movie. Especially places. Yes, you can get rid of the person and not have to think about them, but you can’t tear down that building or town you went to together.”
“You don’t miss the relationship or the person but the routine. You came to expect talking to them at certain times, seeing them, telling them everything, your dates and how you spent time together, etc.
It leaves a hole that it takes some time to adjust to and find new ways to fill,” one suggested.
4. Losing Family
“Losing family,” another answered. “I was closer to his family than I was to my own. Of course, the actual breakup hurt a lot, but losing his family was a different pain.
I knew it would be hard but never foresaw its extent. Finally, after nearly five years of them practically being my family, they were gone, and my heart was shattered.”
5. Dog Attachments
“Realizing how attached you were to their dog,” one shared. A second confessed, “If my significant other and I ever split, I would petition for equal custody of our pets.”
Finally, a third advised against it, stating she and her ex-husband have joined custody of the dogs and are forced to see each other every two weeks.
Someone shared, “The emptiness. I found it particularly challenging when I left a toxic relationship because I had put SO MUCH time and energy into thinking about the relationship.
Googling specific issues, wondering whether I should leave, planning the breakup, and fighting and going on the constant rollercoaster of emotions. When I left, it was peaceful, and I could finally focus on moving forward. Still, all that peace and autonomy were almost scary for a while.”
7. Happy News
“Happy news! It’s the worst feeling in the world when you have happy information that you would usually rush to tell that person, and you reach for your phone and then realize you can’t,” another admitted.
8. New Relationship Pressure
“I felt the pressure to have a new relationship, which I overcame,” one explained. “I just told the people who tried to send their partner-seeking friends my way that simple NO and blocked them.”
9. Becoming Strangers
“This is a random one- but seeing them again a while after and realizing that you don’t know anything about them anymore.
Seeing them in clothes you’ve never seen, shoes you’ve never seen, not knowing where they’re headed or what they’re up to,” one suggested. “It’s bizarre.”
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Finally, many people in the thread noted the regret. One added, “Wondering why I stuck around—replaying situations and wondering why I didn’t just walk away then.”
We hope you enjoyed this Reddit discussion about things that happen after break-ups that aren’t recognized until afterward. This article is inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Motherhood Life Balance.
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