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One of the biggest joys in my day is stumbling upon threads I can learn from to be a better person. For example, while taking my daily scroll, I came across the question, “Women of Reddit, what are men not ready to hear?” Here are the top-voted answers.
10. Stop Telling Us To Smile!
One woman shared, “I hate being told to smile. I’ve heard it so much. Just the other day, I had a man, easily 30 years older than me, when I was walking into the grocery store, say, “Smile for me, sweetie!”
Another said, “Yeah, it’s honestly a super predatory behavior. Whenever someone says this to me, I’m either having a bad day, in pain, or sick.” Several women and one man shared that they’d heard this immediately following the death of loved ones. So yeah, maybe don’t tell people to smile.
9. Making Us Feel Stupid, Doesn’t Make You Smart
“Making us feel stupid for not knowing something doesn’t make you look smart,” one stated. Another added, “Nothing is less attractive than a man who makes people feel stupid. It is an instant turn-off. So many of my crushes were dispelled by a boy treating me like an imbecile.”
Men, in general, will be more well-liked if you treat everyone as if they are intelligent beings with the same level of intellect as you. No one likes to be treated as an ignorant child who needs everything explained to them.”
“So if a woman asks you about something, by all means, explain away. Otherwise, assume she knows what she is doing/talking about.”
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8. Contain Your Internal Monologue
“You need to contain your internal monologue,” expressed one. Whatever makes you say, “You look good on your knees…” to me while I’m stocking cans at Target doesn’t need to exit your mouth. Stop.” Seriously though. Knock the catcalling and inappropriate statements off. It’s gross.
7. It’s Not the Same Thing
“Only respecting women you’re attracted to isn’t the same as respecting women,” shared one. Another explained, “I like to call it putting on a fake mask to get in someone’s pants.” A third added, “If you write I RESPECT WOMEN on your dating profile, I know you don’t, and it’s an immediate swipe left.”
6. Saying You’re a “Nice Guy” Is a Massive Red Flag
“Saying you are a nice guy is like a restaurant advertising they won’t give you food poisoning. Anyone who tries to sell you certain positive qualities by name is not those things,” shared one. Another added, “It’s a rapey red flag hearing it, honestly.”
A third confessed, “I’ve noticed that any person trying to convince you that they are a nice person is, in fact, not a nice person. They are usually the biggest jerks in the bunch. Finally, one stated, “Instead of being a nice guy, try being a kind guy.”
Popular Reading: 10 Green Flags From First Dates That Ensured a Second Date
5. Anger Is An Emotion
After someone expressed anger as an emotion, so angry men are emotional, another argued, “My therapist told me that anger is a secondary emotion and is the mask for a deeper feeling. Find the deeper emotion (betrayal, pain, grief, embarrassment, etc.), and you can target the root cause of the anger.“
Finally, someone shared, “Excellent response. The number of men I’ve heard who call women ‘overly emotional’ go awfully quiet when you point out that men commit 98% of violent crime.”
4. Clean Your Bathroom
One woman admitted, “If your bathroom is too gross to poop in, it’s not gonna work out.” Another argued, “My rule is if it’s too gross to puke in. Be that friend or otherwise. If you can’t maintain your bathroom, we’re not chilling at your place.”
One man shared, “My roommate and I kept a spotless apartment and had many female friends that crashed at our place constantly. Our bathroom was clean, but we both learned hard lessons about keeping enough toilet paper. Two guys don’t use much, but ladies do. So keep it stocked.”
3. It’s My Job Buddy
“It’s my job to be nice to you at work. But, I’m not into you,” shared one. Another added, “Yep. I bartended for a long time, and many guys didn’t understand this.” Finally, a third shared, “I worked in customer service on commission… Almost every guy would interpret a sales pitch as flirting because I was a female.”
“We had a universal selling process with literal steps, the same across the company – so it had nothing to do with what I was saying, just that I was female and friendly. So, buddy, you just came in to buy something from me. Of course, I will smile at you and say hello!”
2. Fill Up the Pool
Foreplay is important. For the love of god, cut your nails. Always wash your hands first and remember, “You got to fill up the pool before you free Willy.” It physically hurts otherwise, and that’s why women complain.
1. Emotional Intimacy
The number one voted response (over 26k votes) is, “Emotional intimacy can lead to better sexual intimacy.” One person said, “110% this. I am more interested and aroused after a heartfelt conversation with emotional connections than I ever am with anything else.” Another confessed, “At this point, I don’t even care about the latter.”
We hope you enjoyed this Reddit picks list of things men aren’t ready to hear, according to women. This article is inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Motherhood Life Balance.
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As a full-time working mom of three, I know what it’s like to feel like life is out of balance and out of control.
While I don’t have it all figured out, I am committed to sharing helpful tips and tricks with other mommas who are ready to break free from negativity, ditch mom guilt, & finally, live life on their own terms.