Is Having Kids Really That Bad? Real People Share Their Answers
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Today, get ready for an exciting journey into the world of parenthood. Imagine sticky hands, nights with little sleep, and a constant stream of dirty diapers. But is having kids truly as challenging as it seems? Brace yourself, as we are about to uncover the truth!
Sleep Deprivation Chronicles
To start, a user simply said, “My kids are 3 and 1. The last year I have often wished we would have waited longer with our second child. It’s hard work on too little sleep.”
From Blah to Bliss
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Diaper Dilemmas
One said replied, “ I wouldn’t want more than one more. I like having a fairly peaceful home, getting enough sleep, keeping the place tidy, etc. Some people can manage that with big families. Other people don’t mind the chaos. You just have to know yourself.”
Juggling Parenthood
A user added, “It’s the hardest but most rewarding thing you will probably ever do. Having a kid does mean you sacrifice the person you were before, and some people can’t get over that. So think about your life just now, and if you’re willing to give up a lot of your independence cause that little human will determine a lot of your choices, then start really thinking about it. “
Carefree and Careless
One popular comment said, “Childfree here, in my 50s and very happy with zero regrets. I’ve had time to find and run my own company and save enough resources for early retirement. I could focus on traveling, hobbies, and moving halfway across the world. I grew up in a large family where everyone had children and realized pretty early in life it was not something I wanted.”
Embracing the Chaos
A user replied, “As long as you understand going in that, anything can happen. What if the child is disabled? Can you handle that? Are you prepared to not sleep more than a few hours at a time when they’re born? Everyone talks about the terrible 2s, but no one warns you about the threenager. A toddler with a teen attitude. Or how many why questions you will be asked. I love little kids but prefer the teen years.”
Unconditional Love
A user commented, “ Becoming a parent means it’s no longer about you. It’s about them. The people that regret it are most likely not ready for it to be not about them anymore. I have kids, no regerts. Nothing wrong with you wanting to focus on yourself it’s just really hard to do both. Especially with multiple kids.”
Crash Course in Patience
A popular comment said, “An old guy once said something to me about kids “I wouldn’t take a million dollars for the ones I have, and I wouldn’t give you 10 cents for another one.” It’s very true. Having children is the most gratifying and simultaneously the most thankless and frustrating task you will undertake in your life.”
Balancing Parenthood and Relationships
One smart user replied, “Especially if you are a woman, be very aware of how your partner is with sharing the adulting responsibilities.”
Nurturing Unique Personalities
One suggested, “18 years in, I’ll say this. Don’t have kids just because it’s what you think you’re supposed to do next. Ask yourself if you want a baby or a child, or a teenager. I witness so many people who love babies but seem to merely tolerate children. You have to be prepared for the work. They’re not pets or creatures to mold to your specifications. They are tiny humans with their own wants and needs. If you can’t detach your expectations and your reality, it can be very challenging.”
Endless Money Cycle
One user commented, “I adore my kids, but not sure I would do it again. Had to work full-time before, during, and since I had them. I would have been working regardless, but when I think of the amount of money I’ve spent on diapers, Legos, other toys, used cars, prom, car insurance, medical, orthodontics, college, rowing team, lacrosse team, and on and on.”
The Power of Parental Guilt
A popular comment said, “Make sure you want kids for you. Not because society says you should have kids, not because your parents want grandkids, not because you have some misguided idea that your bloodline is inherently important and needs to continue. Because you (as a couple) genuinely want to bring new life into this world.”
Sibling Rivalry: Love and Turmoil
One replied, “It’s been 22 months almost the loss of independence is awful. Still, I could give it up if I got something worthwhile in return, but the return is almost nothing. Every day is screaming: one baby stole a toy from the other, one baby is in a chair, and the other wants to sit there. Not one aspect of my life has improved since they were born.”
Traumatic Births
One sad user commented, “I am a new mom, so I can’t comment too confidently on long-term child-having, but what I can say is that people do not warn you how life-destroying birth can be. I had a super traumatic birth, and I feel like it has ruined my life. I love my son completely, but if someone had told me how bad it could/would be, I wouldn’t have done it.”
Health Conditions
A popular comment was, “It depends. I know it would be absolutely horrific for me due to disability and the way I want to live what remains of my life, and the soul-crushing guilt I would feel for passing my poor health on and having to answer to my child.”
Lessons Children Teach Us
One comment was, “Three and a half years ago, my sister died(that wasn’t a bad thing she was a cruel and violent individual who repeatedly hurt her own daughter and the rest of us), and I received custody of my niece. I used to never want kids, but now that I take care of her, I don’t know what I would do without her. She saved my life, and I love her more than anything in this world.” Source: Redditors
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As a full-time working mom of three, I know what it’s like to feel like life is out of balance and out of control.
While I don’t have it all figured out, I am committed to sharing helpful tips and tricks with other mommas who are ready to break free from negativity, ditch mom guilt, & finally, live life on their own terms.