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Motherhood Life Balance

How Motivation Works (And How You Can Use It to Crush Your Goals)

ByVictoria Cornell June 2, 2025
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Motivation is such a powerful force. When you really get how it works, you can use it to reach whatever goals you set for yourself. The science behind motivation tells us there are basically two main sources that drive us to move from where we are to where we want to be. These are:

Moving Away from Pain

Sometimes, motivation kicks in when we’re dealing with something painful or uncomfortable in our lives. Maybe it’s a tough relationship, health issues, anxiety, or just feeling stuck. At some point, that pain pushes us to say, “Enough is enough—I need to change.” That moment sparks motivation and action.

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The tricky part? Once the pain eases or disappears, motivation can fade too. You might change your habits, feel better for a while, and then slip back into old patterns once the discomfort isn’t as strong. Pain-driven motivation often gets quick results, but it can be short-lived because when the pain lessens, so does the drive.

Moving Toward Pleasure

The other source of motivation comes from focusing on what you want—your goals, dreams, and desires. When you clearly define what you want in life (whether it’s a better job, healthier relationships, or personal growth), that vision pulls you forward. This kind of motivation tends to last longer because it’s about creating something positive, not just escaping something negative.

Many people find that writing down their goals—whether financial, personal, or professional—helps keep this motivation alive. But sometimes, this motivation can falter too, especially if progress feels slow or the results don’t show up quickly.

Combining Both for Lasting Motivation

Knowing these two sources—moving away from pain and moving toward pleasure—gives you a powerful tool. When you combine them, you create a motivation that’s both strong and sustainable. You push yourself away from what you don’t want while pulling yourself toward what you do want.

Motivation is a foundation for success, change, and happiness. Understanding what drives you and what holds you back is key to staying motivated in the long run.


How to Be More Self-Motivated

Finding motivation isn’t always easy, but it’s a skill you can develop. The best part? Self-motivation comes from within—you have to decide to be motivated and then take action. No one else can do it for you, though support from others can help.

Here are some steps to help you build your self-motivation muscle:

1. Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

Real growth happens when you challenge yourself. Stepping out of your comfort zone doesn’t mean doing something crazy or against your values, but it does mean trying new things and pushing yourself beyond what feels easy. Set goals that stretch you a little, and work hard to achieve them.

There will be moments when you doubt yourself or feel unsure if you can finish, and that’s okay. Those moments are what push you to discover just how capable you really are. Once you realize you can handle more than you thought, staying motivated becomes easier because you build confidence with every success.

2. Be Willing to Take Risks

Playing it safe all the time rarely leads to big rewards. To really move forward, you have to be willing to take some risks—smart, calculated ones. This might mean trying a new career move, starting a project, or stepping into unfamiliar territory.

It’s important to be thoughtful about the risks you take—never do anything illegal or unethical—and to keep a long-term view. Sometimes the payoff won’t be immediate, but if you stay committed, those risks can lead to great rewards down the line.

3. Think Positively

A positive mindset is a huge part of staying motivated. Life isn’t perfect, and challenges will come, but how you choose to see those challenges makes all the difference. Instead of letting setbacks discourage you, try to see them as opportunities to learn and grow.

Self-motivation builds on itself. The more you achieve, the more motivated you become to set and reach new goals. This creates an upward spiral that lifts you higher and higher.


Life will always throw curveballs, but when you understand motivation and learn how to keep it alive, you’ll be ready to face whatever comes your way. Motivation won’t just be a New Year’s resolution—it will become a part of your everyday life, helping you create the future you want.

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Victoria Cornell
Website |  + postsBio

As a full-time working mom of three, I know what it’s like to feel like life is out of balance and out of control.

While I don’t have it all figured out, I am committed to sharing helpful tips and tricks with other mommas who are ready to break free from negativity, ditch mom guilt, & finally, live life on their own terms.

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